Mar 26, 2011

5 Things Career and Love Heartbreak Have in Common. Anything to add?

Anyone remembers the song of Nazareth’Love Hurts?’’. Guess not. It must be 40 years old, but you still catch it on the radio, on the rare occasions. If anyone is still listening to the radio. Here is the link just in case.

The catchy part goes, ''It takes a lot of pain, takes a lot of pain…''

Am not here today to tell you it took me some decades to decide love should not involve (just) pain, and you should do all in your power (or get help) to escape relationship in which the pain is the dominant feeling.

OK, not all of it is plain sailing, some great loves and relationships end up in terrible heartbreak, and the ones that survive do have their ups and downs, couple of disappointments or even heartbreaks that need to be resolved and dealed with.

Isn’t it what happens at work, career?

In books, films, sometimes in training courses it seems that you just have to be doing a good/great job and you will be:

o Happy

o Recognized

o Appreciated

o Rewarded

o Secure

o Promoted

What Career and Love Heartbreaks Have in Common?

Just thinking ‘’Happiness requires growth and growth inevitably involves pain…’’

The love song I mentioned at the beginning continues,

''Some fools think of happiness, blissfulness, togetherness….

Some fools fool themselves I guess

They re not fooling me…''

We know we are not fools. So …During the course of our career we'll take a few blows and probably have already. Somewhere down the road we are likely to hurt more or less.

There will be nasty moments…surprises we don’t like to think about. Some will feel like a heartbreak.

And just like in love ….

1. It is not fair.

2. It hurts.

3. It can destroy your self-confidence.

4. The more you invested in it the more difficult it is to get back on your feet.

5. You will have to deal with it.

Would you like to add anything?

First 5 Career Heartaches That Come to Mind

(I faced or someone close to me)

1. You got hired by a great company, or doing a job you love, but get a (new) boss you can not stand. The feeling seems to be mutual.

2. You are as good as the next guy (or often better), but ''the next guy'' gets position you were working for. You still keep all the work and responsibilities, he gets the glory. The reasons are various. (e.g. You are a woman and he is not, the boss says he can control him easier, he seems to make the boss feel better than you do, he can market himself and his achievements better, his father-in-law is CEO of potential client, etc. Anything to add? Am sure you do, so please go ahead. Just hit the comment section below.)

3. You are in company for 7 years, when you find out new entrants are making 20% better salary with other benefits, e.g. paid apartments, flights home. Just because they joined the company at the right time? A long time after you did! You feel taken for granted just like in good old marriage.

4. You are hired to do one type of work (not exactly what you like or want to do, or hoped for) or fill one position temporarily, and that became indefinite. Nobody is mentioning promotion or change anymore. Amnesia, anyone?

5. You are a Head of Sales. Customers start complaining about support, or product problems. You are losing customers, potential references and market share. Your sales drop, competition is killing you, and your CEO shows a funny way to deal with reality. He brings in another guy to improve the sales, pays him 3 times your salary. New guy becomes your boss, doesn’t get expected results, and is learning from you.

I can go on and on, just don’t want to get my list too long. I’ll leave some space for your ideas.

Have you ever been angry, heartbroken at work, or felt like a fool?

What can you add to this list? Any career heartbreak you don’t mind to share? How did you deal with it?

To get more articles, updates, free or special offers, and to download my e-book''Productive Executive/Manager - Manage Interruptions at Work'', join the mailing list if you haven't done so already.


  1. No traffic to websites

  2. That's honest, anyone who has ever had a website or a blog knows or remembers what it feels like! Thanks for sharing.

  3. I love really helped me to formulate some ideas that I have about careers and relationships. Thanks!

  4. Hi Detra, you are welcome, and thanks for your comment. Very happy to hear you ''loved'' the article, and found it helpful. All the best!


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