Dec 17, 2010

You are successful but are you happy?

Yes, I watch Sex and The City, and no, this article is not about single girls, fashion or sex (sorry). In one episode Carrie was saying that her guru advised her to be more ''in the NOW'' to feel happier in life. She laughed off his advice, because ''he died penniless and single.''

It made me instantly remember happy moments when I was penniless and single, and also unhappy moments when I was making few times my friends' salary, was in relationship with rich guy, or travelling to places of my dreams.

Feeling of happiness was lasting for some time and then it was all back to normal or worse. And I am a positive, optimistic person according to all who know me and Strengths Finder , too. (Positivity is one of my top 5 talent themes. ) That sometimes make me wonder when I feel so bad sometimes - how the other, ''less naturally positive people'' cope with not feeling happy or even miserable?

Have you ever wondered, ''Is this all there is? Is there something more/better to come? '' Or, ''Surely I should feel happier, more fulfilled?!'' Some of you told me - you have.

Are there levels of happiness that are more lasting, more long term?

If you thought that becoming rich(er), getting promotion, new car, having a family, winning a lottery, being slimmer/looking younger would make you happy and it did (only) for some time before you got accustomed to it (and wondered if it was normal) - you will enjoy this 9 minutes video:


In this video, Ronald D. Siegel, Psy.D., assistant clinical professor of psychology at Harvard Medical School discusses what it takes to be happy.

You can watch 9 minutes video, or go directly to the part of it answering questions:
  1. What is positive psychology?
  2. Why is happiness so hard to achieve?
  3. Do people hold misconceptions about how to achieve happiness?
  4. Why is it sometimes difficult to become happy?
  5. What are some ways to achieve happiness?
  6. What is mindfulness?
  7. How do you practice mindfulness?

I recognized few points that match my experience, like:
  • We become accustomed to happiness.
  • Propensity for happiness is hard wired, we have level of happiness we go back to whether things are going good or bad.
  • By using our strengths/virtues - sense of wisdom, justice, curiosity, compassion of others in daily life we become happier.
  • Happiness ''feels like'' engagement, flow, being in the zone, experiencing what we are doing now, enjoying the process, living life in the way that is meaningful to us and the others etc.

Over the past 3 years I read few books based on positive psychology and found myself enjoying it, because it does not teach you how to become ''happy go lucky '' person but explains when, why and how feeling of happiness arrives and maybe it can help you create, recognize or appreciate it. Which is not bad at all, is it?


You don't have time to think about many important and pressing issues and let alone spend time on evaluating if you are happy, or if not what you can do about it. Enjoy the video. It is 9 minutes well spent on your happiness.

Too bad I can not send it to screenplay writers of Sex and The City now, just to inform them Carrie's guru had a point after all.

What makes you happy and do you get time to think about it? Is there anything you can recommend?

Please share this article with friends. You never know who might get the answers they need.

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2 comments:

  1. Amazing article - with this informative video -
    thanx for sharing

    was really helpful
    Eman

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you Eman for stopping by, reading and letting me know what you think.
    I am very happy about it:)
    While researching happiness,I found some answers that are helpful for me too, so it was a pleasure to share.

    ReplyDelete

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